Angry Robot

Why Hollywood Won’t Cast Cary Elwes Anymore

Just read the whole thing if you like good writing. Trust me.

‘The Simpsons’ To ‘The Problem With Apu’: Drop Dead

Scalding Hot Takes: Ready Player One

Nathan Rabin:

Yes, Ready Player One spent 140 minutes jerking me off but instead of pleasure or release, all I experienced was rawness, bleeding and painful chafing. 

Wilbur Ross Shakes Self Awake After Briefly Dying During Cabinet Meeting

Pizza Hut’s Pie Tops II sneakers can order a pizza and pause your TV

Trump’s Hair Illusion Came Undone and We All Missed It

How Facebook Is Killing Comedy

Behold, Steve Bannon’s Hip-Hop Shakespeare Rewrite: ‘Coriolanus’

What.

You’re welcome / THE HORROR (via)

Greatest sample ever?

The Top 1% Must Stop Insisting They’re Not Rich Right This Instant

Gawker savages a Jonathan Kay piece about how $200k/yr isn’t enough money

Pretty sure this is the greatest video ever made

The best way to end oppression is to very politely ask oppressors to please stop oppressing you. Also, consider getting them a gift certificate for The Cheesecake Factory. Oppressors love The Cheesecake Factory.

Woman trapped in window trying to retrieve poo after Tinder date

The “About Us” Page of Every Digital Media Agency – McSweeney’s

To appease male fans, Doctor Who announces every Dalek will have visible penis

Beaverton

CBC Comedy is the worst crime against humour this country has ever committed

‘The moment when it really started to feel insane’: An oral history of the Scaramucci era

Via Funkaoshi. Looks like I picked a heck of a ten days to go on vacation and then get sick. My favourite part is “Pickle”.

Balls Out: The Weird Story of the Great Truck Nuts War

It was an intense and bloody battle between two older men who didn’t really know how to use the internet—over fake balls.

Goodnight, sweet wince.