DISTRACTRO

Distractro enters. He is covered in flashing lights. There is a video game console embedded in his back.
DISTRACTRO: What’s up, man? Have you checked out Gizmodo lately?
D: Nah man. Just trying to write here.
DISTRACTRO: Ew, with that font? Gnarly. You know there are some really great monospaced fonts these days, what was that post with like ten of them? Bet if you googled it…
D: Oh yeah, there was— no! Later, I’ll worry about that later. Okay.
(WRITES)
DISTRACTRO: Pretty dark in here. I mean, that’s cool, if you’re cool with that.
D: I can open some blinds. Here-
D opens blinds in the living room, then the kitchen.
Distractro quickly takes D’s place at the computer and begins to tap at the keyboard.
D: No! What are you writing!
DISTRACTRO: Nothing…
META–DISTRACTRO enters. Small FIREWORKS are constantly firing from his body, and his head is spinning around rapidly.
META–DISTRACTRO: YOOOOOOOO!!!!
D: Fuck it. YOOOOOOO!!!
D begins to dance, as “Boom Boom Pow” or some equally nightmarish single begins to bang from the speaks.

END.