Angry Robot

It's My Birthday

Should I mourn the lost years, celebrate the memories, raise a glass to the future, hang my head in shame, cry if I want to, commit to excellence, reach for the stars, dance around the issue, buy new shoes, free the monkeys, sculpt a living testament, open a fast food franchise, make my nine millimeter go “bang,” live the legend, go to Defcon 5, buy into the dream, sell the plantation, get out for good, split the atom, exert worldwide rights, enforce the rules with feverish abandon, measure my accomplishments in ounces or grams, live life to the half-fullest, tickle the toes of the Great Satan, bathe in Guinness, salute the Poutine, dismember my opponents, overcome all obstacles, meet the challengers, best the biters, bite the bullet, believe the doubters, doubt the believers, move my troops into position, see if this “life” thing pans out, query, measure, surrender, advance, retreat, turn on, turn off, step back, tear off, triumph, or just take ‘er easy?

9 comments on "It's My Birthday"

  1. marijke says:

    mmmm…. bathing in Guinness….

    whatever you decide to do, I hope it’s a rawkin’ good time, big D.

  2. adam says:

    Free the monkeys. As if you had to ask.

  3. mageebags says:

    “Take ‘er easy.” You’re just so damn good at it!

    All the best, old chum.

  4. mattylarge says:

    give ‘er

  5. D says:

    Thanks all.

  6. Lucy j says:

    take me to the gum ball machine

  7. ÿ says:

    Sorry. Does it bother you I do this? Would an email be more appropriate? Look, don’t get mad, ok? I’ve warmed up 29 for you. Is goot year. You make much fire this year, yes? You do. Good. Ok.

  8. D says:

    Thanks pal. This year I plan to bring: rage, power, majesty, mounds of treasure, love, prosperity, munificence to those I cherish, and discredit and miserable failure to my enemies. I will build a bridge to the future. All of our dreams will become reality (except the one where you’re falling into a giant bumhole). Finally the earth wil know peace and goodwill, and in the process I will enrich myself beyond imagination, and will lavish splendour upon my supporters. I will finally build that solid-gold castle I’ve been going on about. My superpowerful weapon is near-complete. In addition I will become enlightened.

    That’s what the fortune cookie said, anyway.

  9. Sassy says:

    Happy belated D.

    I hope you gave ‘er!

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