Angry Robot

Eye Exam Pt. 2

See the thing about this game is that it requires light – a lot of light. I had two lamps and an overhead light and it still wasn’t enough. When the camera can’t read the cards the screen tells you to place the cards again, but it took numerous attempts of various illumination techniques until the board would read the cards again. Time waster. Then the music…Oh god. It’s like twisted screeching pain echoing through the swollen stomachs of pus demons wailing in the night. It’s just really bad. I don’t even want to think about it anymore (thankfully you can turn it off but unlike on the 360 you can’t play your own tunes during gameplay).

The actual gameplay is super fun, at least to me, and it’s easy and fast to pick up even if you’ve never played a card game like Magic before or anything involving Mana and Hit Points. Like, you could basically just place cards down til one worked if you really didn’t know what was going on…The goal is to own five out of the nine squares which you do by simply standing on them. Each square is either Mechanical, Water, Fire, Earth, or Air (which looks like desert). Each card has an icon to tell its elemental alignment, mana cost, hit points and damage. Placing water cards on fire is bad because if they have low HP they die; the same goes for Earth in Desert/Air, Fire in Water, etc. Some cards don’t have elements so they can rock it anywhere. The big bad awesome cards have chains on them, which means you can’t use them until four squares are in play.

This easy-to-learn gameplay would be super fine if not for the constant card misreading and light issues with the camera. The mic on the camera also wasn’t super clear for me but that could have been my setup…though I doubt it.

The last thing that was bothersome to me was the length it took for the animations to occur. You can turn them off but the whole point of the game is to see them interact so why does it take so long! Seriously, you place the card and then it has to be summoned and then it goes into battlefield mode and then it strikes and yeah this all should just happen immediately! Summon and then strike should happen in like 15 seconds tops. Yeah, yeah patience, Luke, patience…Whatever! I needs me speed man! If I’m playing a card game, I need speed to make it awesome!

Besides all of the above silliness I really did enjoy the play. I wanted to play round after round and would have continued to do so if not for the need to play The Simpsons demo. If I had more time, well, could have played more but I definitely will be playing more Eye, which is weird since it does have so many bugs…but I guess it did win me over after all.

It had me at Triceptaur Behemoth…It really, really did.

Eye Exam Pt. 1

I just wrote this scathing (yet loving) account of my experiences with Eye of Judgment over the weekend and my computer crashed and I lost it. The emotions I felt from this were very akin to the feelings I felt when the Eye refused to read my cards or when two lamps and an overhead light were still not enough to illuminate my cards to the all-knowing, all-seeing eye. So I’m a bit perturbed by the whole thing.

The Crash or the Eye you say?

Well, let me retype this sucker and then you can be the judge of that.

The Problems with Game Journalism

Yes, I know that rants aren’t in themselves a solution, and yes I’m aware of new games journalism. And I’m not claiming to be the first person to perceive or write about these problems, nor am I doing a good job of backing up what I say with actual data. But hell, it’s a rant! Fuck you and your data!

Numerical scores suck

Agreed. They are pseudo-scientific and misleading. I’m not a huge fan of star ratings either, but they would be a mild improvement.

There is no category except gameplay

categories

An IGN review will give separate numerical scores for the following categories: presentation, graphics, sound, gameplay, lasting appeal. To their credit, they qualify the overall score as ‘not an average’ of the category scores, but still: what’s the point? To make the inevitable comparison to film reviews, when have you seen a film review mention anything like this? Would The Blair Witch Project get a 1 in graphics? Would Citizen Kane fail in presentation because the credit sequence was boring?

If the cinematography is great or horrible, you mention it, but in most cases it’s not worth mentioning because the only important thing is how is this film overall. Putting gameplay on equal footing with ‘presentation’ and ‘sound’? WTF. But really, even graphics and replay value pale in comparison to gameplay. What does gameplay mean? What it feels like to play the game, right? What else is important? Which leads to

The industry is obsessed with graphics

GPU power!

Graphics historically is a handy way of evangelizing games. I’ve shown games to non-player friends who are wowed, and you hear “it’s so lifelike” “it’s like being in a movie” and so forth. But really, graphics are more important as a way of selling hardware, and it is not the game journalist’s job to sell hardware.

It’s a facile point, but great graphics do not a great game make, nor do they really convert people into gamers. What does convert people are fun, accessible games. The Wii, notoriously the worst of current-gen consoles in the graphics department, has done more to expand the reach of games than the last twenty years of graphics development.

What’s more, obsessing over graphics, like obsessing over CGI in film, conditions people to prefer new games over old, and so leads to a general ignorance of game history.

Down with Previews

Games journalism is unhealthily devoted to upcoming releases rather than current or past releases. I’m far too lazy to do any kind of quantitative measurement, but I’m sure you know what I’m talking about: the bulk of coverage on mainstream games sites is screenshots, trailers, ‘hands-on’ previews and pre-release gameplay footage. Articles in the ‘news’ category are more often than not release date announcements. Actual reviews of current games are drowned out by all of the preview hype. To say nothing of in-depth, quality ‘features’ that might take a bit of work and research.

screens

You read a few previews and I’m sure you’ll see a phrase like “I’m sure they’ll fix it before the game ships.” You can’t criticize a game that hasn’t shipped yet – all you can do is hype it. Constant previews are of no benefit to actual players; they’re beneficial only to the developers and publishers. They are promotional material. And we gamers internalize all the hype, and we’re giddy with anticipation for games years in advance.

This is ultimately counterproductive to everyone in the industry, since the constant hype creates inevitable disappointments when we actually play the game, and it doesn’t have sex with us and deliver us to the promised land. Which makes us cynical about the whole process. That’s not to say that previews have no value. It is interesting to know what games are in development. But it shouldn’t be the bulk of the coverage.

That brings us to the next bullet point…

You are more than a press release delivery pipe

We get the press releases here too, and it’s sort of a running joke that you can predict the articles on a couple large gaming blogs based on what press releases have recently gone out. The PR companies send out the releases and give you access to their FTP site from which you scoop out the screenshots and then post them in a nice, pageview-inflating ‘gallery’ on your site. Everyone wins except the reader.

Press release journalism isn’t exclusive to the games world, but that doesn’t make it any better. Those of us doing sites and magazines or whatever should be acting as filters and not pipes. And that takes a little work separating the relevant from the ir-.

Games journalism is out of sync with actual players

The average Canadian gamer is 39. Now picture a 39-year-old reading IGN, gamespot or even GameFAQs. Picture them watching ‘Xplay’ or ‘Attack of the Show’. They do so with gritted teeth.

Now, what’s happening with that average age number is that the vast numbers of older, casual PC/online gamers, those who play the odd game of Tetris or Solitaire, are skewing the number way high. I’m sure the average age of a console gamer is way lower.

skitched-20071103-155640.jpg

But that said, the essential truth is that the gaming audience is much larger and more diverse a group than is served by the mainstream gaming media. This is probably the biggest problem facing the industry, and it’s not necessarily the journalists’ or the publications’ fault, but it is something that they (we?) need to address. There is a problem with the age range and gender of readers targeted by the mainstream sources (obviously young male). There is also a growing hardcore-vs-casual divide, made all the more obvious by the massive growth of casual gaming thanks to the DS and Wii. When the mainstream sites actually review casual games, they often do so with poorly-veiled condescension and resentment. Go read a review of The Phantom Hourglass to see some examples of this.

It’s fairly easy to see how the age and gender problem can be solved, and in fact the growth in games coverage by the mainstream non-gaming media (such as newspapers) is helping to alleviate it. But I don’t know exactly how we best serve casual players, or even get them to read what we write. How do you appeal to someone who plays only one or two games? How would a regular casual game reviewer not themselves be a hardcore player? The terms ‘casual’ and ‘hardcore’ would have to be unpacked a little more, but that’s not what I’m on about right now.

That’s enough for today, huh? I’m sure there are many more problems, and any of the few I’ve given here could be discussed at much greater length. But my attention span ain’t what it used to be…

END RANT

Erik Wolpaw Interview

Rock, Paper, Shotgun interviews the writer of Portal (who also worked on Psychonauts):

In defense of games, I want to point out that the writing in plays, including everything by August Strindberg and The Lion King, is 100% pure crap. So we’re doing better than they are even though they have the benefit of mostly not being about space marines.

Lost Planet

I’m superthrilled to introduce a new weekly comic, The Adventures of Eyeless Max, by Toku. Welcome to the Robot, eyeless one and Unnamed Flying Thing!

Wanzer!

This is of course not a new game. Front Mission first appeared on the SNES, and the franchise has graced the PlayStation, PS2 and even mobile phones. This is a port of the first game, with touch- and dual-screen support added, but not in a mindblowing way. The retro-shoddy graphics and typography have their special charms, but mostly they make one pine for a new installment of the franchise rather than paying anew for an old game.

Front Mission is a “strategy RPG”, more or less a turn-based strategy game with a story and recurring, level-advancing characters. The protagonists are a band of mercenaries caught up in a tragic war on the fictional Huffman Island. And yes, that war involves a shit-ton of mechs, or as the series charmingly dubs them, wanzers.

What is it that we want out of mech games? For me, the ideal game would allow for 1. near-infinite tweaking in the garage, followed by 2. combat that imparts the size and majesty of giant robots. These are games for scifi gearheads, and the importance of the swapping out of robot parts should not be ignored (I’m looking at you, Mechwarrior). Front Mission definitely has all you could ask for in the wanzer part department. You are faced with quite a number of parts and weapons in the first city, and as you progress through the campaign, stopping at new towns and cities each with new parts on display, the number of options quickly spirals up into the stratosphere. The choices are not simply for looks – there are a number of attributes carried by both mech parts (body, arms, legs, CPU) and weapons, and the way you customize your wanzers and your squad is completely up to you.

But the game fails to do #2. I’m not saying the gameplay is no good; I tend to enjoy strategy RPGs (I like any variation of strategy game). But you face large numbers of similar enemies, and every battle is marred by slow, unskippable animations of mech fights that cumulatively slow down the gameplay to a pace a narcoleptic snail might enjoy. It doesn’t help that most of the strategic thinking happens in the garage. Once you’re on the field, you basically send in your close-combat bruiser wanzers to give your missle-firing bastards some room to breathe and hope you remember to use your repair chips in time. Repeat.

The story ain’t bad, but man, I’m starting to think my DS is infected with some sort of scrolling text disease. Every game with the lines of text that animate on typewriter style and then wait for you to press A. At least in this one you can press B and speed them up a bit. The radio-voiceover-over-gameplay model of narrative delivery has its problems, but I started to yearn for it. I had forgotten all about the drawbacks of texty games.

Generally, the mechophiles will still play this game. We will twiddle our thumbs through the combat and yearn to be back in the garage. We will keep playing because the holy grail of mech games is still nowhere to be found.

Castlevania: Back To The Future

The treat comes in the form of a compilation made up of three games. The original “Dracula X: Rondo of Blood”, a 2007 remake of Rondo, and Rondo’s natural sequel, “Symphony of Night”. These titles are hallmarks of the series and a must have for any Castlevania or old-school gaming fan. Here is where the trick comes in. Rondo of Blood was never released outside of Japan, so clearly this game is geared for the Japanese fandom that played the original.

The 2007 remake of Rondo sports re-vamped (no pun intended) music, voice overs and 3D visuals, but the pains of the old game also follow suit. Richter is achingly slow, and the mechanics of jumping and walking up stairs could drive some gamers to feed this to the dogs.

Besides that, Dracula X Chronicles is a fun homage to old-school gaming. Still, my initial thought was: why sideline Symphony of Night as mere unlockable content? This is the game that topped many critics “Greatest Game of All Time” lists and developed a serious cult following both in and outside of Japan.

The game’s music is considered the best in the series (if not gaming music on the whole), and its RPG elements took Castlevania off the well-beaten path and into new and greater territory. The fact that SoN is now available on every current-gen game system (minus the DS) makes me wonder why it didn’t get a fancy new re-do similar to Rondo Of Blood.

While Belmonts abound on the handheld, the future of Castlevania on home consoles is still uncertain. With so many ‘Vania titles marginalized to the handheld systems, many fans wonder if and when Koji Igarashi will make a Castlevania plunge on the PS3, 360 or Wii. Is he discouraged by the lack of 2-D appeal on next-gen systems? or is the niche of Demon Hunter games slowly being taken over by other franchise titles like Devil May Cry? Rumours continue circulating, but let’s hope the future of Castlevania is just as bright…or rather as dark as its past.

Phoenix Gaming aka Gamer = Time to Play?

The problem I’m having is the fact that I seem to have no time to play, which sucks because (unlike D) I really want to finish Zelda, but I have to sacrifice the time I would use for that to play Ratchet and Clank Future: Tools of Destruction. I haven’t even had enough time on that game to write about it adequately. And soon Assassin’s Creed and Mass Effect will be here and what am I supposed to do then? It leaves me thinking, do I only play games when the title is so good it forces me to forsake all things to focus solely on playing it ala Bioshock? That seems…Unpleasant to think about. It makes me think that I am only a sometimes-not-really-gamer-only-when-it-suits-my-fancy. I don’t like to think of myself as that.

Yet, being a “born again” gamer – I dislike that term, let’s think of a new one – but being a Phoenix Gamer maybe my need to game correlates directly with only playing titles I know will make me immensely happy. There’s not enough time to play duds! I think in this GO GO GO world we live in being a gamer requires a lot of personal sacrifice with your time. You can’t take your time cooking meals after work if you want to get enough hours in on a game, you can’t read a book, you can’t hang out with friends who are not gaming, and you can’t spend time with your significant other if you need to crack into the first few chapters of a title like Bioshock. This is frustrating. Kids and teens can game almost endlessly, but what about the older generation?

At the Guitar Hero II launch I was playing with a wonderful woman named Guin. She was rocking that plastic plaything like nothing else and I asked her how she got so good. Her answer: she plays every night with her husband. They play a variety of games together ever night, a true gamer home! I was flabbergasted and more than a little envious. This was a partnership of two gamers who loved to play and who spent a dedicated amount of time each day to the pursuit of that play time. Is this the answer? Does an environment of pro-gaming encourage more gaming? I have every console and handheld in my home and still I find it hard to sit down and play. Am I really that ADD?

When I was listening to the WoW Radio Station show Octale & Hordak Vs The World they were discussing what it meant to be a gamer. Octale stressed that in order for a guild to truly function and for players to get the most out of their raids they had to commit to a time to play and show up. This commitment was the key to being a gamer. You say you are going to play and you sit yourself down and you play. I think that in this new world of gaming, where there’s almost too much to play at one time, you do have to treat it with that kind of respect one would give hockey practice or running or yoga or martial arts. You need to put in the time to get back the rewards of experience. I’m not talking XBLA points here, I’m talking about the absorption of the stories we play, gaining the skills and the knowledge to play your best in online arenas, and the personal satisfaction knowing at the end of the day you are a gamer because you have put in the time and you have finished what you set out to achieve.

Veni, Vidi, Vici

Fez

is a game in development that “has the potential to change the way you think about reality”, according to Arthouse Games’ exclusive preview.

Angry Robot Sounds 6

Nadine was fired from the show and replaced by the much more Harvest Moon-friendly Mark. Kidding, Nadine will be back next time. In a perfect world, it will be all three of us!

Anyway, Mark and I do go on, about: first person shooters (incl. Halo of course), post-Oblivion RPGs, “you got your narrative chocolate in my nonlinear sandbox experience”, the lack of a good giant robot game, and retired pipefitters playing Wii games. And yes, Mark defends Harvest Moon’s honour.

Angry Robot Sounds 6 (16MB mp3, 49mins)

Subscribe on subscribe in iTunes

Piñatas sure know how to party…

Right off the bat we’re treated to the flashy and energetic opening of the show, which has been modified a little to fit the game. The menus that follow the visual theme set out by the original VP and are all well organized and easy to follow. In the game setup, there are number of options for game type (offline, online) and length; including the usually absent “short” which you can play through in 10-20 minutes…. Nice! There is also a nice new option called “keep it close” which will adjust the scoring to do just that. This is, of course, great for the parents playing with their kids – Now little Timmy won’t always have the upper hand.

The game itself is broken into rounds that start with a foot-race which is followed by a number of Challenge games. The race portion is fast-paced, with characters collecting power-ups and items to use against their opponents as they vie for that coveted first place. Tip: if some jerk other player covers the track in honey, butterfly wings are the solution. Your position in the race determines how many bonus points you’ll receive after each Challenge game. This is where I would guess the game does most of its “keeping it close” since they send out Mr. Galagoogoo to dole out the points and we all know how unpredictable he can be.

The Challenge games themselves are creative, and very easy to pick up (as they should be). They range from simply running around collecting candies (from a giant candy-tossing ball…. Odd) to pin the tail on the Zumbug (using what I can only imagine are high-powered tail launching rifles – complete with scope!). Each game runs for about a minute and then you’re onto the next Challenge game or race. Honestly, I found the pacing was perfect for this type of game. I want my party games to pop; I don’t want to sit through boring nonsense between rounds (Fuzion Frenzy 2… grrr…), spending more time out of the games than in them.

Overall, I think Krome Studios really hit the mark with Viva Piñata: Party Animals. From the flashy graphics and amusing animations, to the over-the-top voice acting and fantastic soundtrack, to the creative Challenge games and furious foot-races, VP Party Animals is a premier party game that I highly recommend for everyone.

-GigerHR

Oh, and I have to send out some props to Xbox for their choice of venue for this event. It was at Hernando’s on Wellington St. in Toronto, and it couldn’t have been a better fit for the game. Nachos, quesadillas, bright and colourful décor, friendly staff, and a fantastic party game equals a great time!

The Moon Books Project

Mayhap you’ve already come across this link, as it ain’t new, but the Moon Books Project has a plethora of public domain films and books formatted for use on the popular DS homebrew media app, MoonShell. You’d probably get a better reading experience by picking up the works in cheap paperback format, but to each his own. And there are some film classics in there: Night of the Living Dead, Kurosawa’s Ikiru and Rashomon, M, Welles’ The Stranger, Carnival of Souls, and inadvertent comedy greats Plan 9 from Outer Space, Reefer Madness and Hercules.

I Gave up on Zelda

As I mentioned on the podcast last week, I had been very excited for Zelda: Phantom Hourglass, expectations perhaps unmeetable by any game. (I haven’t played a Zelda game since loving A Link to the Past 15 years ago, so my comparison point is a distant, near-mythical gaming experience, not a recent Zelda game.)

The game has many great things about it, primary among them the control scheme. The touchscreen controls are completely intuitive for most operations like running around and slashing things. Some specific things venture into gesture territory: drawing a path for the boomerang, the fishing minigame, the sword’s circular slash. And all of those things wind up being fun. And, of course, the way the game encourages you to draw on maps is something that could only be done on the DS, and while it’s somewhat half-baked (“draw exactly this on your map. Got it? Okay, put away the map.”), it’s still nice to see. The net effect of all the touchscreen control innovations is that this potentially hardcore title is effortlessly transformed into a casual game. My girlfriend could easily play this Zelda game, which I wish could be said for Halo and many other franchises I enjoy.

I liked many other things about The Phantom Hourglass: the music. All the weapons are fun. And it did take me back once or twice to the old Zelda happy place of distant memory. But two things made me drop it.

  1. The RPG elements are way too lite. The only customization on offer seemed to be ship parts, and roughly halfway through the game I could see no effects when I swapped out parts. And maybe I’m too spoiled by Oblivion, but any wholly linear RPG I play these days seems to be missing the point. It’s not just character customization, it’s the lure of poking around off the beaten path. Nadine tells me that Zelda is a kid’s game, but I don’t know how that changes things. The things I love about RPGs were almost entirely missing here, leaving a repetitive, easy puzzle game with a childish story.

  2. Repetition. I don’t want to go through the same dungeon over and over again. It’s one thing to use the same level environment repeatedly for different reasons (bioshock), it’s another to have to transverse the same space repeatedly to get to new encounters (Halo 3, level 2). But when I have to play through the same three levels of a dungeon for the third time, while a counter counts down, to unlock a whole new level of the dungeon that has the same enemies, platforms and puzzles as the first three levels that I have played three times – that’s just too much.

I didn’t throw down the DS and storm off in a huff, I just got to a point where I decided I’d prefer to play Advance Wars: Dual Strike instead, and I haven’t gone back. And assuming I keep finding good games to play, I probably won’t.

Which leads me to an “issue”. I must have played at least 10-15 hours before I gave up. This game has gotten extremely good reviews. Are these things related? Or is my repetition-aversion more of an outlier? The working theory I’m going on is that most reviewers did not play through the entire game before reviewing it, and granted, I know it’s hard to get reviews of 20+ hour games done on a deadline. The other possibility is that other reviewers are forgiving Zelda fanboys, which is also certainly more than possible.

Angry Robot Sounds 5

We talk Halo 3, Zelda: The Phantom Hourglass, and how Nadine is racist against anime(?). Plus, games we are looking forward to.

Angry Robot Sounds #5 (16MB mp3, 35mins)

Subscribe on subscribe in iTunes

Star Wars IS Gaming: The Continuing Comparison

When I read the bio for the bad guy from the upcoming super-big-time-fun-hit-trilogy-in-the-making Mass Effect, I was taken aback by the lookielikeyness of Nihlus to a certain super evil tipper of the scales man in black.

It has been my hobby of late to compare games to Star Wars. Why? I don’t know. Obsessed am I. Content crave I do. The funny thing is I didn’t know I was such a Star Wars geek until it started coming up in almost every conversation I was having…Very eerie.

Anyway, when I read the bio this is how I read it, for serious, and you cannot argue the similarities. Well, you can, and if you can please do, but seriously…Read it.

Nihlus Kryik is one of the Citadel Council’s most decorated Spectre agents. Born in a small mercenary outpost outside Hierarchy space, he learned the hard way to fight for anything he wanted. His father died when he was 16, and his mother forced him to join the turian military. His outsider status made life difficult; though he was always at the top of his class, his superiors and peers never truly accepted him.

As a soldier, Nihlus’ skills were unquestionable. His attitude, however, often got him in trouble. On several occasions, he disobeyed direct orders to do what he thought was best. Although his instincts were usually proven right, his notoriety grew. Even when he single-handedly routed an enemy patrol, and saved his squad from ambush, his commanding officers berated him for his recklessness. His military career seemed to stall before it even began.

After being reassigned to a new squad for the third time, Nihlus was introduced to Saren Arterius, a fellow turian and a Spectre. Saren was impressed with the young soldier. He befriended Nihlus and offered to mentor him. Within a year of meeting Saren, Nihlus was asked to join the Spectres.

Free from the restrictions of military procedure, Nihlus excelled in his new role. He quickly stepped from his mentor’s shadow and established himself as one of the Council’s top agents. Since then, Nihlus has completed countless missions as a Spectre, each one more difficult and dangerous than the last.

Cool under pressure, Nihlus has an uncanny ability to find an enemy’s weakness and exploit it. Though his methods aren’t as brutal as Saren’s, he will not hesitate to efficiently and thoroughly eradicate anything or anyone that stands in his way.

So there you go. Darth Vader. See, Star Wars is like a virus of storytelling. You become infected with the ease of its stereotypes and forever will it dominate your destiny.

Think on that awhile and when you play this next great game in space see what else comes up. Chances are something will.

Just saying.

Essential Facts about the Canadian Videogame Industry

The Entertainment Software Association of Canada has released a very interesting report on the state of the videogame industry in Canada. The number that screams out is the average age of gamers: 39. Seems crazy high, until you realize this takes into account anyone who has played a computer or console game in the past year, so it includes someone who logged onto yahoo games once for a game of scrabble. Which is still a game, though – I’m not saying that the numbers are suspect. Rather, it’s good to get a reminder that our medium reaches a much more diverse group than you would often think.

Other facts of interest:

GH III: Soundtrack CD and the DLC Booya!

Just saw this over on Kotaku and I am totally stoked. Loving the songs themselves? Not so much (I don’t recognize any of the three tracks offered). Loving the idea of giving away DLC tracks with the sountrack CD? Abso-freakin’-lutely. I had a similar thought myself back when I first heard that Harmonix would be offering complete albums as DLC for Rock Band. How awesome would it be to pick up the new “insert name of band here” album, and along with it get the entire album as playable content for RB/GH3? Sure, there’d be a premium price for the DLC version, but that’s nothing new; special editions for new CDs abound and we gladly pay more for an extra live track or two. Now, instead of a live track I get to play along with the band? Count me in.

I’ve always been a fan of this kind of “trans-media” entertainment, and this announcement gives me hope for bigger and better things to come.

Variety on Games Criticism

This little thing could be the start to an interesting discussion of games criticism and journalism, making points like: game reviews are more important to their industry than film reviews, it’s hard to write game reviews for non-gamers, and game reviewers are too easy on blockbuster titles. Unfortunately, none of the points are really unpacked. What’s so hard about writing about games for non-gamers? I have some ideas, I’d just like to see this fleshed out.

Can't Stop The Eye!

I’ve never been a super card player, stats are confusing and complicated and when I’ve tried to play D&D it always takes me forever to go through the process of character creation. Seriously, I am so ADD when it comes to character sheets. Give me a controller and a tv screen and I’m golden, pencil and paper…not…so…much…

Anyway, we all get the concept. Lay your cards down and one will inevitably be better than the other or be able to defend against the other and bam you have an epic battle that ends with one card being dimissed from play. This is not the tea I want in my cup.

Enter – Yesterday when I experienced the Eye up close and personal like. As I watched a card being placed on the playing mat and the players hand became visible underneath the battlefield on screen I felt a sort of omnipotent crazy flicker within me. I flashed back to the first time I watched Clash of the Titans as a child. ‘Yes’, my inner Divine called out to me, ‘You wield the power of life and death in your hands!’ I ached to experience that power. Suddenly, a plume of dark magic erupted from the card that had been set down. A huge, fierce creature emerged from the cloud, horns gleaming from the red devil’s head, its whip slashing against the hide of the cat like monstrosity it rode. My heart stopped. Chaos magic. The smaller figures on the battlefield scurried about helplessly as the chaotic whip slashed them apart. Ecstasy. Pure and complete geek out to the extreme fantasy awesome. Of course, that’s how I experienced it.

Many people may find my description over the top and melodramatic but that fact remains this device inspired me to express myself that way. I was inspired to completely and utterly geek out and feel like I was ten years old again in my back yard pretending I was Luke Skywalker (…the hell?).

The whole debate about what title will change the fate of the PS3 is stupid in my opinion. But in terms of what I would be looking at this christmas as new and fun and playable, well, Eye of Judgement fits that bill. I’m not saying blow hundreds of dollars on a card game. I’m just saying we’re finally starting to see some games that are using what the PS3 has to offer…mostly.

I want to play Eye of Judgement. I want to have nights where I can play this with my friends just like when I play Halo 3 or Guitar Hero (and soon Rock Band) or Wii Sports. I’m happy because now I can share the PS3 with my friends who don’t have one. Not just “oh hey watch the cut scenes of Heavenly Sword” but something far more satisfying.

It will be interesting to see if this game will have a Red Sea effect on the gaming community. All I know is that I want to play it even though I had raged against it previously because I thought it was the end times for imagination.

Yet now I see it is not a herald of the imagination ice age…It is the bright centre of the nerd fire within us all.

And I say, let it burn.

Ars Profiles Wireless Nomad

Until reading this Ars article, I had never heard of Wireless Nomad, a Toronto Co-op ISP. I don’t think I can use them because it doesn’t sound like they can deal with dry ducks or whatever they call it when you have DSL but no landline, but I wish I could. They’re cheaper than Bell, with no bit caps. And every router they give out provides free WiFi access to people in range, in such a way that doesn’t hurt the subscriber’s speeds. If you live in Toronto, you should consider them ahead of Bell and Rogers.

Angry Robot on Hypaspace

The Master Chief Challenge site is now live, and the 3-minute special segment airs as part of Space’s Hypaspace Weekly show tonight at 5:30et and tomorrow (october 6th) at 4:30et. It’s a game from a mini-tournament between us and the Space team, and the bulk of the footage is in-game action via Halo 3’s innovative ‘saved films’ feature. The segment will find its way to the website over the next couple of days, and there will be two more following it. Enjoy!

UPDATE: The video is now on the site, you can see it here
UP-UPDATE: A writeup from Kris Abel of Tech Life, who played on Team Space. Props, Mindslinger!

PSP & ME

Unlike a new home console, a new phone, or a new anything, the reason for my admirations of the PSP is not just the mere fact that I was one of the first people to have one. Home consoles you can only play at home, new phones you can only display when you practically need use a phone. But more than the others, the PSP made me a poster child for new technology. It played music, video, and games on a screen that was beautiful sized for a mobile device. Playing with it was fun, but playing with it the day after its release was …empowering. I’m serious. At that time few knew what it was or that it had been released, so people looked at you like you like you came back from the future to give them faster than light travel or something. It was awesome!

Even though the “Newness” has worn off, Sony has created a system that is forward thinking and can receive updates like a PC or the next-gen home consoles. Most of these updates have been lame attempts to stop hackers, but some of them have added some interesting new features to the PSP adding both functionality (like the web browser) and individualistic style to each system (like themes and wallpapers).

The games for the PSP haven’t been AS revolutionary as its dual-screened competition. But they definitely have been fun, with a wide variety of genres as well as adaptations of home console and arcade games. Here are some of the titles kept me playin…

Ridge Racer

Although it was a launch title, there has yet to be a racing game on the PSP that beats Ridge Racer’s “middle of the road” goodness. It made good use of the system’s best qualities, creating a driving system that was fun for both advanced and first time players, while at the same time combining all the best cars and tracks of previous Ridge Racers.

Tekken 5

Now I am not really a big Tekken fan but I have to acknowledge how well the arcade translation worked on the PSP. Fighting games translated to the PSP usually have a problem with performance, but the controls perform smoothly and the graphics seem as if they were hardly “dumbed down” in the PSP adaptation. Tekken 5 is definitely the best of the best in the fighting genre.

Syphon Filter

With all the Sam Fishers and Solid Snakes of the world, one would think that there isn’t room for more. This couldn’t be further from the truth. The PSP installment, “Syphon Filter: Dark Mirror”, helped to revitalize this underrated franchise. Its easy to use “snap to” targeting system, graphics and engrossing story made this a must have for any PSP owner.

Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories

Another great translation on the PSP. Both graphics control and gameplay are shrunk down PSP-size without losing any of what made the game so iconic and fun. My only complaint would be that unlike the home console version, you can’t swap the game music for your own. This would have been a nice touch.

Lumines

The puzzle genre may be run by the Nintendo DS now, but at the launch of the PSP, Lumines wowed many gamers into siding with Sony. With its simple concept mixed with an elaborate presentation and its entrancing soundtrack, Lumines took the popularity of past puzzle games like Tetris and brought it into the new millennium.

Angry Robot How To: Kickass Gamerscores

Yes, it’s true; I have fallen for Microsoft’s new little marketing strategy. I am head over heels in love with these little digital merit badges, and I’m not ashamed to say it. There are few things I enjoy more than seeing that “achievement unlocked” message pop up while I’m gaming. In fact, I like seeing it so much I will actively seek out games in which I’m sure I can get most or all of the available achievements. Some people lovingly call this “achievement whoring.” I call it “selling my soul for a few meaningless virtual trophies, whose only real effect is to show the world how nerdy I truly am,” and I want to thank the person who came up with this idea. I have completed more games since the launch of the 360 than I had in all the years preceding its launch combined.

And I have achievements to thank.

Before achievements? I dropped those half-finished games without a second thought. Now? I find it nearly impossible to put down a game, knowing that if I just press on a little further I’m going to nab myself a cool 100 points. It’s really quite satisfying to look at my list of played games and see a nice even 1,000 points. You know, some of those 1,000 pointers are games I would never have played in the first place if there were no achievements –- and there are some real gems in there if you go at it with an open mind. I’ve even gone back and replayed some of these (Surf’s Up for one… boo-ya!) just because they were a whole lotta fun to play. There’s nothing better than going through a game that’s a load of fun and coming out the other side with a big stack of ‘chievies (that’s my new word for today).

It has been brought to my attention that some people are feeling like their Gamerscore is a little underdeveloped. Myself, I feel that I’ve cultivated a nice, well-rounded Gamerscore; one that I can take a little nerdy pride in, and maybe I can help some of you along in your quest for a more fulfilling score. All you have to do is follow my easy 12 step program!

Step One: Drop that silly gamer pride and resign yourself to the fact that you’re going to be playing some games that will be considered “uncool” by your peers. Just remember, your peers are nerds too, and sucks to their assmar if they have a problem.

Step Two: Play King Kong straight through. One of the first games for the system, one of the easiest 1k you’ll get and it’ll take you less than a day. It’s a good warm-up, and with that nice thousand point base, you’re off to a great start!

Step Three: Visit a site like Achieve360Points and browse through the achievement lists. Look for games with a short list of achievements, and if the site lists them, a low difficulty rating. Pick one that looks interesting, and get to playing. Tip: Games based on films are usually a good place to start.

Steps Four through Twelve: Have fun! The key is to pick games you’re likely to enjoy, because that’s the whole point of gaming. If you find you’ve picked a game and it just feels like you’re grinding your way through just for the ‘chievies, give it up. Your response to the statement “I can’t believe you played all the way through that game” should never be: “I really can’t believe it myself… I feel kinda dirty… but I got these shiny achievement things at least! Right? Guys? Where’re you going? Guys!?”

That’s just the wrong way to be.

When someone says to me: “TMNT? Seriously? WTF, man?”
I say: “Solid graphics, concise story and damn if it isn’t a blast running around a 3D obstacle course as a bipedal turtle!”

There you have it. Four Twelve easy steps and you’re on your way to a healthier, more robust Gamerscore. I really can’t stress the having fun part enough though. I got myself some of those 2K6 sports game ‘chievies (yeah, that word actually sucks, so, I’m going to stop using it now), and honestly, it felt a little bit like dying at the time.

Well, my profile is done migrating, and I’m pretty much done here for now anyway, so before I go, here are a couple games to get you started:

GigerHR’s Happy Fun-Time Easy Achievement List:
Surf’s Up – maybe I’m biased ‘cause I loved the movie, but this was great fun
TMNT – see above
Lego Star Wars II – yes, I’m 60pts short, but it’s a kickass game nonetheless
Need For Speed Most Wanted – beat the game, get 1k points, and it’s not a “kid’s game”
Viva Piñata – fun, relaxed pace and only heartless evil demons don’t love the Galagoogoo!

Dear Robot,

We are ignoring you but we don’t mean to. We’re doing that Master Chief Challenge, the halo tournament, which keeps us busy into the night. But that’s okay, right? Since you and your readers will get to see it really soon. There’s a lot I’ve meant to write for you, just not a lot of time. And the podcast, I know. Sorry. I swear we’ll do it soon.

Please don’t get angry.

Halo 3 in the Press

Nothing comprehensive here, but I just wanted to mention a trio of good articles about everyone’s favourite hype-fattened juggernaut. This interview with Brian Jarrard of Bungie is mostly about how Bungie was disappointed with Halo 2. Then there are good pieces by Clive Thompson in wired, one about AI in Halo 3, and another on the topic of the game’s level design.

There’s also an interesting interview with Claude Errera, webmaster of halo.bungie.org, in Online Journalism Review.