I’m in the employ of Boards of Canada – I’ve been hired to adapt what seems to be a thick legal document into song form. Why they want this done is not explained. However, before I can complete the task I am chased by some nebulous evil. The chase goes on for some time, but before the outcome is resolved the dream fades into obscurity. I wake and take a slash.
All in all this was a disappointing dream. The premise is intriguing, if somewhat unbelievable; but of course it’s barely developed before the requisite chase scene takes over. Can we have some dramatic unity here? Even the chase is nothing to write home about, since we are given no villain to oppose, and there’s no resolution at all – the dream just peters out as if it lost interest in itself. Sometimes you just have to ask – what’s the point of it all?
I give this dream one and a half stars.
The Queen of B Paintings. Especially liked trash*, pussy hair styles, the dangers of sex, the expression on the sex addict‘s face, and hey, there’s scrotal sacs!
- Ah, memories of that Don Simpson quote: “I like that girl. She’s trash. I like trash. I am trash.”
Paul Martin’s blog. (via the “worst blog of the year” contest here.)
Testing the ability to post to the site via NetNewsWire Pro.
Kids, there’s way too much eggnog around these parts for me to update any more this week. Have a good eggnog, everyone.
There’s been a design overhaul at Bloggus Caesari. Soon to come is an architectural overhaul, and I want your input. There’s quite a lot of information there and I’m not finding it very easy to navigate as it stands right now. Here’s what I’m aiming at:
- add a Roman-time date for every entry. (I’ll keep a real-time date as well, but I’m not sure whether I’ll display it).
- organize posts into “chapters”, pages with posts listed in chronological order; this should make things easier for first time readers, and will add some cohesion to the narrative, although it means stepping away from the “weblog” metaphor
- I’m thinking of making the map a more significant part of the site. I may include an updating map image on the front page that reflects Caesar’s current position and destination.
- proper search feature. The Atomz search, as I’ve (sloppily) configured it now, lists a ton of redundant results… I’ll change over to the MT search, which works beautifully.
- ditch the weekly archives and possibly the individual entry archives
- give up on using the comments system – if necessary, I’ll have discussions over here
- more on-site background info
- more links to Roman history resources, there are tons of great sites out there
That’s what I’ve thought of so far. The map feature may not happen, as it would involve a lot of work that I’d need someone else to do, and so would need to ask for donations etc. etc. and I’m not sure it’s worth the trouble. Comments encouraged.
Ladies, start your engines. (via adampsyche)
Once every six days the day started with two periods of politics followed by one of french, all taught by the same kindhearted longwinded dwarf who was tolerable for one period but absolutely unbearable for anything more. So we’d skip the double and enjoy a leisurely breakfast, hot eggs and peameal and a neverending cup of coffee administered by a man named Dana who said things like “more diesel?” before a cup refresh and who may still be there to this day – I’ve been planning an expedition.
We’d return for french class, flagrant absenteeists. The gasbag trusted in the system, you see; he believed in democracy, he admired the fine workings of a well-oiled judicial branch, and he believed in the school’s absentee monitoring system. All he’d say is “I trust you’ve spoken to Mr. N about your lateness.” Mr. N was in charge of the attendance book, in which all tardiness must be logged with an appropriate one-line excuse, typically “sick,” “car trouble,” and the like.
But we had an in with Mr. N. Possibly he admired our come-what-may lighthearted approach to life, I’m not sure. He definitely wasn’t beyond a good face-reddening and the lifting of a student off his feet with all his kung-fu football power, but he never applied such tactics to us. We could write whatever we wanted in his stupid book, week after week. One day King submitted “Operation X” as his excuse, and I “Operation Y”. A couple years later a resourceful student compiled a list of the most entertaining attendance excuses, and ours were featured heavily. But I have to admit they were not the best. The best was given by Jost, and read simply, “bad love.” As good an excuse for anything in this godforsaken world, I’ll never know.
Interesting ambient music generator, via Jerry Kindall.
Saw the film last week-end. No, the suckmaster doesn’t wreck it, nor
does he suck – he’s back in all his pre-8mm, pre-Con Air majesty, the Nick
Cage you might have seen in such films as Raising Arizona and Wild At Heart.
It would be hard to argue that this isn’t a good film. To argue that it’s
not a great one, one might start at the end. Spoilers herein.
Curious that to argue against its greatness one winds up asking, is it a
good adaptation?, and that such a question is obviously at the heart of
the film. The critical tendency is to evaluate adaptations solely on their
relationship with the original work: The Shining film is better than the
book, no, it’s worse, etc. For adaptation, then, one might wonder whether there is any reason why the Orchid Thief was chosen as the source material: is there any thematic link between that book and the film itself? Or could Kaufman have simply inserted his story into any book, to identical effect? Well, orchids are adapters. The film mentions they are not parasites: while an orchid may grow on a tree, it takes nothing from the tree itself, only light and water from the environment. The insinuation is that orchid-like, the film operates independently from the book: based on it, but an independent being. Consider the film separately, don’t, then, treat it as an adaptation at all.
I tend to agree. What’s on screen is all there is in a film. The source material — like tidbits about what happened on set, or speculation about the director’s psyche — is beside the point. And the problem on screen in this film is the end. It all works thematically, and it’s oh-so-clever: once Hollywood formula hack twin Donald starts helping with the script, we get car chases, drug deals, torrid affairs and window-peeping. Up until this point Charlie has been concerned with the themes of The Orchid Thief, but suddenly all are put aside in favour of the violent, cathartic Hollywood ending. What does this mean? Maybe unity is no longer necessary in scripts, sure; maybe they’re saying the story couldn’t be told properly by Hollywood, or that adaptation is always doomed to failure. But it feels like a failure. It feels like a different film, and it’s not as funny. Did Charlie Kaufman deliberately wreck his film to prove a point? Or did he simply fail?
But like I say, it’s still a good film: I only take issue with the last 20 minutes or so, the rest is excellent in every possible way. However, I can’t help but think a flawed ending mars Adaptation’s greatness. Then again, I’m still trying to figure out what I think about it, which is always a good sign.
There aren’t many things that make me want a PC, but this is one of them. A 3D operating system, sort of. I’m sure it’s at a rudimentary stage of evolution, but it only makes sense that a 3D OS will replace today’s 2D models just as Doom eclipsed Commando. Check out the gallery.
Note that the free demo features advertising inside your virtual pad; if you pay for the product you can put anything you want on the walls. (Seems the programmers heavily favoured Maxim girls – or is that actually advertising?) I’d like to see how they handle shortcuts – if they’re clever, quick camera moves (as seen in Metal Gear 2), rather than cuts. Also, you can’t help but wonder how a networked world will be represented by the system.
I don’t expect it will happen overnight – as in fact some level of naturalism is needed to lure new users – but eventually such a system, for reasons of efficiency, will become abstract and look less like “real life”. And that, I’d like to know what that will look like: less Star Trek, more Escher, I’m guessing. For example, in a 3D world with no concern for gravity, why wouldn’t the ceiling be used for shortcuts, etc.?
Finally, let me just smugly note some similarities to something I wrote over a year ago for joystick101.
Should I mourn the lost years, celebrate the memories, raise a glass to the future, hang my head in shame, cry if I want to, commit to excellence, reach for the stars, dance around the issue, buy new shoes, free the monkeys, sculpt a living testament, open a fast food franchise, make my nine millimeter go “bang,” live the legend, go to Defcon 5, buy into the dream, sell the plantation, get out for good, split the atom, exert worldwide rights, enforce the rules with feverish abandon, measure my accomplishments in ounces or grams, live life to the half-fullest, tickle the toes of the Great Satan, bathe in Guinness, salute the Poutine, dismember my opponents, overcome all obstacles, meet the challengers, best the biters, bite the bullet, believe the doubters, doubt the believers, move my troops into position, see if this “life” thing pans out, query, measure, surrender, advance, retreat, turn on, turn off, step back, tear off, triumph, or just take ‘er easy?
Y’all are familiar with d/blog’s own cult thread, right? The one where a bunch of idiot teenagers have trouble working their radios? Well, looks like adam‘s got one he’s been hiding, on the subject of the Snoop de Ville.
My fave comment:
In my country, it would take many oxen to pull such a car, were it to run out of petrol. Half of my tribe could sit in the “bitch seat” alone. And do you know how much grain the trunk would hold?
Most respected Mr. Doggy Dogg, please consider sending one of your fine cars to my village. We would grant you five of our women and Tp!ca, the village fool. He may wash your many fine cars for you.
Keeping it real in the motherland,
As a borderline mind-boggling followup to last week’s rapping snack clothes, I give you Rapper Dentist Daddy & Hip Hop Dentistry. (via kafkaesque)
The Perpetual War Portfolio:
an evenly weighted basket of five stocks poised to succeed in the age of perpetual war. The stocks were selected on the basis of popular product lines, strong political connections and lobbying efforts, and paid-for access to key Congressional decision makers.
All this week, new photos over in that part of the site. And precious little gasbagging over here.
Have a look at this
MeFi page for all sorts of great links related to World AIDS Day, which was, er, yesterday.
This just in: the Onion copies skitfaced. Of course, most will assume the other way around…
In this article, we learn that Rapsnacks plans to release a line of clothing. Then, I imagine, a film franchise based on the clothes which are based on the snacks which are based on popular music entertainers: “Jay-Z Vs. The Mummy’s Delicious Rapping Pullover.” The next logical step down the spiralling staircase to hell that is cross-promotion might very well be:
You tell me.
Tropisms is another videoblog, for the time being centered around travel, which seems like a good use for visuals. Oh, and here’s Leaf enforcer Tie Domi’s website, via hockey pundits.
I agree with ÿ‘s excellent write-up. A great film, and hey, this new “Hip-Hop” thing is sweeping the nation! I found it curious that the film manages to address the accusations leveled at Eminem (mysogyny, homophobia, intolerance of the mentally ill) as parts of the plot. Also, he’s called “Elvis” repeatedly in the film, as a putdown of course – but nonetheless this plays into my not-so-rare pet theory that Eminem is the new, self-aware Elvis. For more reading on this subject: here, here, and, from Chuck D: here.
Other good Eminem articles: by Al Giordano and Mim Udovitch; one from salon.
Third-tier TV celebrity speaks out against pants-shitting.
JFK had colitis and severe osteoporosis, amongst other things, and ingested a complex coctail of antibiotics, painkillers and steroids just to function day-to-day.
It could well have turned out that if the public knew about how ill he was, he never would have been elected. This is what the Kennedys themselves feared, so they made a systematic effort to hide the fact that he had so many illnesses. It was a kind of cover up.
From a great Atlantic article that they have not made available online. However, there’s an interview with the author, Robert Dallek, which gives one the gist of it. (thanks to K for finding this)
God is the computer: from Wired, a take on the universe as computer, of universal computation, and perfect simulation.
It would be a unified explanation of physics (digital physics), relativity (digital relativity), evolution (digital evolution and life), quantum mechanics, and computation itself, and at the bottom of it all would be squirming piles of the universal elements: loops of yes/no bits.
Taoists, it’s nothin’ you ain’t yin-yanged yet.
Interesting that as I was temporarily Howard Hughesified by a seasonal virus, laid up in my command centre, a.k.a. bed, a.k.a. Plato’s cave of twinkling electronic entertainment phenomena, locked in Platonic embrace with my shiny metal bitch goddess, I should come to the same conclusion about the same piece of software as a notable compatriot, at roughly the same time. In short: launchbar kicks ass. I had recently purchased Key Xing, which I still think is pretty sweet, if only as a QuicKeys substitute, but LaunchBar seems to get you to anywhere in three keystrokes. Intelligent and intuitive, like all good (people and) software. Also of note: iPulse from the Iconfactory, a modern-art vision of what your computer was doing half a second ago, and for those with iPods, PodNews, which puts news, weather, and anything with an RSS feed on your li’l music box.